Preschool

Charlotte: Tomorrow is precipitation. 

Me: Oh yeah? And what does that mean?

Charlotte: It means the rain coming down. 

Me:  Very good. 

Charlotte: *after a pause* Why did you send me to preschool if you didn't go? *referencing a previous conversation*

Me: *deciding that "because it was free, and daycare is expensive" is not a good answer* Because I want you to have more education than I did. 

Charlotte: So you don't know about the water cycle?!

(October 25, 2016)

Cops

Butch and me: *reacting to an idiot who nearly caused an accident at one of Joplin's many roundabouts *

Molly: What? What happened?

Me: People just don't know how to do roundabouts.

Butch: *at the same time* A car just pulled out in front of another one.

Charlotte: *in a tiny, ominous voice* Cops gon' get them.

(October 14, 2016)