A Lot

Me:  After I start the TV for you, I'm gonna lie back down. 

Charlotte:  Aw, why?

Me:  Because I'm sick and need to rest so I can get better. 

Charlotte:  Mommy, I wanna go somewhere. 

Me:  I'm sorry, but we're not going anywhere today. 

Charlotte:  Why?

Me:  Because I'm sick. 

Charlotte:  I wanna play outside. 

Me:  Not happening. 

Charlotte:  Why?

Me:  How many times do I have to say "I'm sick"?

Charlotte:  Ummm . . . a lot. 

(October 28, 2015)

Stinks

Molly:  *whining to Charlotte* Why you gotta be so mean?

Me:  What's going on in there?

Molly:  She said my breath stinks!

Charlotte:  It does!

Molly:  No, that was my butt!

(October 24, 2015)

Best Sister in the World

Molly:  My sister is the best sister in the world. 

Charlotte:  Even when I'm mean?!

(October 20, 2015)

Scruffy

Molly:  Daddy, what does "scruffy" mean?

Butch:  Well, it's like Daddy's face, like rough, kind of short hair.

Molly:  Oh, like Mommy's legs.

(October 19, 2015)

Little Defender

Butch:  *to me*  You suck.  *to the girls*  Girls, your mommy sucks.

Charlotte:  He's just sayin' that, Mommy.  You don't really.

(October 13, 2015)

Crap

Charlotte:  *muttering after dropping her baby doll at bedtime* Crap dammit. Crap dammit. Crap dammit. 

(October 12, 2015)

Draft

Molly and Charlotte:  *fighting over who gets to be which Little People characters*

Butch:  Bring me all the people. *lines them up on a table* Ok, we're gonna have a draft. 

Molly:  *starts to fuss when Charlotte takes one she wants*

Butch:  We'll talk about trades in a minute. 

(October 3, 2015)

Snot

Charlotte:  *dramatically and deliberately rubbing her forearm across and around her face*

Me:  What are you doing?

Charlotte:  *finishing up* Snot. 

(October 2, 2015)

Continental Drift

Molly:  *talking about the movie _Ice Age_* . . . the Condimental Drift . . .

(October 2, 2015)

Don't Look Down

Molly:  We should fly someplace. 

Butch:  Well, your daddy's scared of airplanes. 

Molly:  There's no reason to be scared of airplanes, Daddy. Just don't look down. 

(October 1, 2015)