Sneaky

Molly: Did Dad take the iPad?

Me:  I'm positive he did not because you guys were watching it after he left. So you have to figure out where you left it. 

Molly:  *seconds later, coming down the stairs* It was upstairs!

Charlotte:  Daddy put it upstairs. 

Me:  Um, no. YOU put it upstairs. 

Charlotte:  Daddy did it. I saw him sneaky it up there. 

(April 30, 2015)

A Little Bit

Charlotte: *giggling* Daddy, when you bend over, I see a little bit of your butt. 

(April 26, 2015)

I Don't Believe That

Molly:  Is the patty on a hamburger made from cows?

Me:  Yes. 

Molly:  So that means we're going to eat cows.  

Charlotte:  Nuh-uh. 

Molly:  Yeah, 'cause burger is made from cows. Like when you kill cows. 

Charlotte:  I don't believe that. 

(April 25, 2015)

Breath

Charlotte: *looking up while we snuggle at bedtime* Your breath smell like puke. 

(April 20, 2015)

Nobody

Me:  Who do you want to do bedtime:  Mommy or Daddy?

Charlotte:  Nobody. 

(April 18, 2015)

Charlotte. Anne. Owens.

Butch:  *gets onto Charlotte for something she clearly did.*

Charlotte:  I didn't do it!

Butch:  Yes, you did.

Charlotte:  No, Puppy Surprise did it.

Butch:  You're a liar.

Charlotte:  No, I'm not.  I'm Charlotte. Anne. Owens.

(April 17, 2015)

More Time

Butch:  *attempting to reason with Molly in the nightly shower battle* Baths take longer. Showers are shorter. Showers means more time to play. 

Molly:  Later bedtime also means more time to play. 

(April 16, 2015)

Texting

Charlotte: *picks up my phone* I'm textin'. 

Me:  Oh really?  Who are you texting?

Charlotte:  My boyfriends. 

(April 11, 2015)

Best Friends

Charlotte:  *extensive gibberish*

Me:  What did all that mean?

Charlotte:  It means I love you. It means you and me are best friends and love each other forever and ever. 

(April 11, 2015)

Feet

Butch:  *after taking off Charlotte's socks and shoes*  Your feet stink again.

Charlotte:  No they don't!  They smell like strawberries!

Butch:  Why do you think your feet smell like strawberries?

Charlotte:  *rambling gibberish explanation for a while* . . . but Lily's feet taste like pepper and mustard!

(April 10, 2015)

New Language

Charlotte:  *speaks gibberish*

Me:  What language was that?

Charlotte:  Big girl Spanish. 

(April 6, 2015)

Those Clouds

Charlotte:  *throwing a fit at bedtime* But the sun is still up! *pointing to the window* What about dose couds?! What 'bout dose couds?!!!

(April 1, 2015)